Kara + Ballet = OW OW OW OW

For those of you who didn’t know, Meghan was a dancer for about seventeen years.  (Notable performances include Alice in her dance company’s rendition of Alice in Wonderland and Velma Kelly in her town’s production of Chicago…I like to brag about her.)  Anyways, this training has left Meghan with a sense of poise and grace that dancers tend to acquire.

I, on the other hand, have a motto: Kara Doesn’t Dance.

I am the opposite of poised. My mother used to very sarcastically call me her “little gazelle” as I tripped and stumbled through life, banging elbows on doorways that had been there my entire life, and falling up the (thankfully carpeted) staircase.  I have permanent bruises on my knees from falling down so often. My posture is shit, and I know it – I try to blame it on the fact that I was a swimmer for so long and “swimmers just have bad posture!” – but really I’m just lazy and don’t feel like changing my ways.

I was perfectly content stumbling through life in this manner, but the trouble is that I’m also starting to get into yoga and meditation. These things require stillness and control that I have never even attempted to learn. (They also require a flexibility that is far beyond my nature.)  In order to aid me in the process towards reaching my gazelle-like potential that my mother always knew I had in me…………..Meghan is giving me dance lessons. 

We’re starting off with the basics and just doing bar routines – pliés and such. And, dear lord, I have never been in so much pain. Remember, this is coming from someone who was a competitive long-distance swimmer since age six. Doing basic dance movements that six-year-old ballerinas can do reduces me to a shaking, sweating mess within minutes.  I am learning how to control muscles that I never knew I had. 

The benefits have not yet become automatic, but I have already noticed an improved awareness in what my body is doing when it is doing it, which is good, right?

Here’s hoping it pays off in the end!

-K

Apparently Legally Blonde sparks a lot of rampage in my brain

When I was a senior in high school I had a fabulous friend who introduced me to the Legally Blonde, the Musical! Soundtrack..  Kara and I have travelled a lot in the past couple of days what with moving and all.  I’m sure we’ve listened to the soundtrack at least 8 times in the last three car rides alone. (Without counting when we spontaneously break out into song when we’re doing other things).

So because we are in love with Elle and wanted to be lazy and not unpack we decided to watch Legally Blonde the movie.  And all I have to say is:

Why isn’t Elle Woods held up as a role model for girls? 

Because even though she proves herself with sheer determination we as an audience still take her for granted.  She’s just some cute blonde who no one really expects to amount to anything other than being “a Victoria’s Secret model”.  Kara and I discussed tonight during the film about how much more determined Elle is in the movie than in the musical.  In the musical, Elle goes to Harvard for love, and she gets in because she convinces the board that her love is a strong enough reason to get into law school.

But that’s not how movie Elle does it.  No, she gets into Law school with a 179 on her LSATs and not because she had to convince someone higher up that she was worthy, (*ahem* Warner Huntington III).  In the film Elle works her ass off.  She gets her head in the game and her nose in the books. 

WHY ISN’T THAT OUR FIRST INSTINCT WHEN WE ARE FACED WITH A CHALLENGE??

The moment that movie Elle realizes that she will never be enough for Warner, there’s a look on her face where she’s realized that she doesn’t need to waste her time on someone who doesn’t believe in her.  Whereas in the musical Emmitt has to literally force her to “Get a chip on her shoulder.” 

Why did the musical need to take away the determination and true tenacity that movie Elle shows.  Why does there have to be a dashing rescue by the handsome quirky upperclassmen (not that it’s a bad thing…) but movie Elle gets the guy by being herself and kicking ass at the same time.

We need to teach our children to believe in themselves.  And to stay positive like Elle does.  If they really focus on something and think positively there isn’t anything in their way but themselves. 

Honestly, how many times have you thought to yourself,

“Oh, I’ll start that project later.”

“Tomorrow, I’ll have more inspiration.”

“Oh, I have no time for that now.”

How much longer are we going to stand in our OWN way of going after our dreams?  When are we going to realize that later and tomorrow and the time to start is TODAY?  Even better, it’s right now.  Hell, it was five minutes ago.

About a month ago Kara and I spent a couple of hours perusing the psychology section at Barnes and Nobles.  During my search I came across The Magic by Rhonda Byrne.  This book is a spinoff of her book The Secret.  Since we’ve moved to Greenfield I’ve been slowly paging through this book and it’s the weirdest thing.  The whole book is about “How to bring the magic back into your life”, and anyone who knows me knows that I’m a sucker for magic. 

But it wasn’t like the magic I imagined.  Byrne tells you in practically the first sentence.  The magic in life is gratitude.  In just the couple of days we’ve been here practicing gratitude continuously I can honestly say that I feel happier.  Yes there are things that are stressful in our life, but we know what we’re dealing with and choosing not to dwell on the hardships we’re facing but instead look forward with a smile and a heck of a lot of hope.  For the first time in the last 6 years I feel true hope for my future.  This photo program I’m starting IN TEN DAYS (!!!) is going to give me a way to not only express myself but also have a potential to make money.  I’ve never had that before.  When I wanted to be a teacher life seemed easier because the world will always need more teachers.  There was going to be a somewhat steady income from the first couple of jobs.  But the world doesn’t need very many more artists, actors, singers, dancers, photographers and general creative beings.  And so being in college in a major that I loved but didn’t know how the hell I was going to make a living after college.  But now that I have faith and determination (like Elle. (see I knew it was gonna come full circle) I know that these 10 months are going to be phenomenal, and I will not let anyone, especially myself, stand in the way of my life.

P.S. KARA SAYS WE CAN GET A KITTEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Kara’s edit: I SAID WE COULD GET IT AFTER I BECOME EMPLOYED, NOT YET. (But…you know…hopefully soon. Very soon.)]

Ta-ta

M<3

A Declaration

What’s stopping me?

“I’ll do it later.”

“I’ll start tomorrow.”

“I’ll be fine.”

What am I waiting for?

Truthfully, I think I’m waiting for my epic moment to just HAPPEN. Like movies and books and plays and EVERYTHING that we’re taught to base our lives upon.  I’ll have an epiphany and burst into song or a gong will sound or a light bulb will appear atop my head and suddenly my life will start. 

But something is starting starting to tell me that’s not how it works.  THIS is my life and it’s happening right NOW.

Meghan just said that she wants to write a book where the hero gets through his/her plight due to sheer determination – think Elle Woods.  A Wam, Blam, get to work sort of person.  (And -- to those of you who don’t see Elle Woods as that sort of person -- bring it on.)  Anyways – what’s stopping me from being that person?!

I’m sick of telling myself that I’ll get to work later.

                                                            I’ll start tomorrow.

                                                                        Just one more episode!

This is me starting now. 

Bring it on.

Life Update #3

Hey ya'll!

It's been a busy week for the two of us.  We just launched the Moving Ship by getting Meg completely busted out of Vermont -- packed up her childhood room and everything. It was a lot.

But that's all done and we're cleaning house back here in Jerz!  We move into the new place TOMORROW!!!!

I'm so stoked.  We're going from one 400 square foot room with access to a kitchen and bathroom shared by 4 other people, to a 3 bed, 1 bath ALL BY OURSELVES.

With that in mind, I probably won't be putting up a Draco Feels tomorrow, but there will be plenty of New Apartment photos to see :)

-K

UPDATE:

One last thing to leave you with --

Draco Feels: The Stressful Years Begin (Part 3 of 6)

Yes, I finally determined how long this series is going to be! (Probably)

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Last week, we discussed Draco Malfoy, the Ickle Firstie.  Now we're going to fast forward to...

Big, Bad, Death Eater Draco! 

Or, this guy:

Let's be honest, Draco's not much but a pompous pain in the butt for years two through five, but he suddenly gets very interesting in Half Blood Prince.  In order to fully grasp the changes that happen to him, we have to remember those very important lessons that he learned back in first year:

1. The world is not fair to Slytherins
2. You cannot really trust anyone to help you, except maybe another Slytherin 

These lessons hit Draco in full-force at the end of his fifth year -- if you recall, that was the year that the Death Eaters infiltrated the Ministry of Magic and battled with the DA and the Order.  At the end of it all, Lucius Malfoy, among others, was sent to Azkaban and fell in the graces of Voldemort.  Having grown up knowing that his father was in Voldemort's inner circle, and learning that "manliness" means just that, the sudden shift from top dog to chum would have been striking for the sixteen year old.  

A lot happens for Draco in the summer between his fifth and sixth years at Hogwarts -- we obviously don't know all the details, but we can assume that he and his mother were feeling the strain from their loss of Lucius and their fall from grace.  Draco, as the new "man of the house" since his father's arrest, would have been especially tormented. Had these books been written about Draco rather than Harry, Lucius' arrest would have been that pivotal moment where the protagonist learns that even the adults he trusts most are fallible.  So, what does he do? He seeks to prove himself to Voldemort.  He can step up, be a man, and be everything that his father failed to be.  He is young, determined, and full of that youthful sense if invulnerability.  It is this version of Draco that we next encounter on the train going to Hogwarts.

This Draco is more smug that usual -- as I said, he's the new man of his house.  And he's finally been able to step up and prove that he can be a real man (which, to him, means a Death Eater.)  More importantly, this Draco has an assignment straight from Voldemort so that he can finally prove that he can be even more of a man than his father was.  Unlike blundering Lucius, Draco will succeed where everyone else has failed.  He will help the Death Eaters infiltrate Hogwarts, and he will single handedly kill Albus Dumbledore.  And, if he doesn't...the consequences will be severe.  But Draco's youthful confidence will not let him think of failure just yet -- he has a job to do.  

We can most clearly see his new kind of smugness in his interactions with Harry in the beginning of the year. In years past, Harry has easily bested Draco in duels and, if we're being honest, in most aspects of  Hogwarts life.  This new Draco, though, is feeling powerful, and he shows that in a very clear way -- he easily petrifies an invisibility cloak clad Harry and steps on his face, breaking his nose.  (This incident is summarized beautifully in the song In Which I Kick Harry Potter in the Face by Draco and the Malfoys. Listen here!)  Sadly for Draco, this feeling of power doesn't last long...

****

Thanks for reading, guys!  

Next week I'll finish up going through canon Malfoy with some analysis of the end of HBP and DH (Draco's Downfall, if you will.)

After that, we start delving into a different territory and discuss Draco as a Foil Character...but to Who?! (Spoiler: It's not Harry.) 

On Being Nice -- OR -- An Accidental Rant on Rape Culture

Sorry I'm not sorry for the sudden turn this post takes...

-K

***

So, I was watching Dance Moms the other day...
(That's how all the intellectual folks start off blog posts, right?)

Anyways, one of the moms (don't ask me who, I'm not hooked enough to know their names) said something along the lines of, "Well, it can't hurt to be nice to her!"  And that got me thinking.

Does it really ever hurt to be nice to people?!  Sure, all you pragmatic folks are thinking "Yes!" and will cite examples from pop culture where altruistic heroes are "too nice" to the bad guys and blah, blah, blah.  Or maybe you'll cite evidence from your love life where you trusted someone and they tore your heart out anyways. Sure, that stuff happens.  But is it really the fault of the nice person that their actions backfire like that? NO!

When it comes down to it, we really just need to nix the idea that one can ever be too nice or too polite, because that's not the problem at all.  The idea that one can get hurt by being too nice is exactly the same idea that sometimes rape victims are asking for it. Maybe you're thinking that's too far of a jump, but I certainly don't.  Our patriarchal rape culture is exactly the reason we tend to think it's the fault of the nice person when some jerk causes them pain because "they should have expected it." And we make judgments like that all the time.

Let's take a look at some examples, shall we?

• Sirius didn't die because Harry is "too nice" and has a "saving people thing," he died because Death Eaters are assholes.
• Regina didn't cast the Curse because Snow White was "too nice" and didn't execute her when she had the chance, she cast the Curse because she's an asshole. (Save the hate, Evil Regals, I'm just making a point! I know, poor hurt baby Regina, poor Daniel, etc, etc.)
• He didn't break your heart because you were "too nice" and let him get close, he broke your heart because he's an asshole.

Do you see the trend here? It's shocking how completely the problem of victim blaming has seeped into our culture.  We are so quick to say "It was my own fault that I got hurt" rather than "Gosh, that person's a meanie-butt and hurt me!" 

It's time that this trend ends.  Let's call a spade a spade and an asshole an asshole.  Together, we can nix the idea of being "too nice" and "too kind" for good, and eventually overthrow the patriarchy!! 

To lighten the mood, I leave you with Guys Like Potter from A Very Potter Sequel!

"So many douche bags in the world..."

Life Update #2!

Hey y'all!

It's Kara's Birthday!

She's 23 and not really all that excited about it, but I think that birthdays are important and I'm writing this blog post so I'm mentioning it.

But woah, have I been absent for a really long time or what? Sorry guys between injuries and lack of inspiration, our life has been pretty slow.

We've been playing a lot of Sims 3 lately (because we're weird) and we're trying to play a Legacy Challenge. For those of you who don't know what that is; it's trying to stay focused on playing one family from an original sim through it's 10th generation. It's a handful. Kara's sim just had triplets. And already had a toddler who had only been a toddler for about 10 minutes.   She was less than enthused.

We're getting more and more excited about moving into our second apartment soon.  A relative of mine is moving and we've been able to pick up a lot of furniture for our new 5 room place.  We literally lived in a single room in New Jersey this summer, so we're not quite sure what we're gonna do with all of the space... but I'm sure we'll manage!

I was nominated for the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge by my uncle last night and so obviously I nominated Kara.  Make sure to enjoy us getting drenched to raise awareness.

Tomorrow we're going back to work at my mom's school and hand out locker combinations.  Fun!  But, hey.  It isn't heavy lifting and we get to be outside in the sun all day!!

I hope you've all been enjoying Kara's Draco Feels series!  I know it's churned out some very interesting conversations from us.

What we've been listening too:

http://8tracks.com/obscuredviewport/so-you-wanna-go-to-hogwarts :  A silly playlist of wizard rock (Wrock) :P

That's about it for now.  Look forward to Kar's Friday Draco Feels and maybe something intellectual from me sooner or later.

Ta!

Meg<3